Catholicism.

Before I came here, I thought a lot about the church/jesus situation. I was very sad to leave my church. I had basically just found it, was finally opening up to people and then, the opportunity came up to come over here. I looked into it and I thought yeah, I can do the Catholic Church, it's basically the same thing, right? and nuns, surely the opportunity to be with saving-the-world nuns will make up for the theological/liturgical/accepting differences between the Catholic church and my amazingly-beautiful-in-oh-so-many-ways Episcopal Church (both particular and world-wide)

And now, now I'm not so sure. Let me start with: I can be extremely shallow when it comes to church. I went to four Episcopal churches in Des Moines during the three months I was there (not counting the Anglican/TAC that I attended pre-moving). I attended all of them twice, except the one I decided was good enough, which I attended thrice.

I really don't have any other (liturgical) options, though I heard about this ultra-protestant one that my mom would probably rather have me go to, but the stories, they scare me. But in some ways, the liturgical route just makes me realize what I'm missing. I miss the "subtitles" I miss the Nicene Creed (they use the Apostle's). I miss a hymnal - words on a screen, not the same. I miss the organ - guitar, not the same. I miss the confession of sins, [especially now that St. Stephen's is using the "most merciful god" (which is my favorite) or at least they were for Easter. Now, I don't know.] I miss hearing things Mother Kathy says. Acutally, I REALLY miss hearing things Mother Kathy says. And the cadence of the prayers is all wrong. (one of the churches in des moines, I decided not to go there because i hated how the priest ran through the Eucharist (rite d) as fast as he possibly could. (I personally don't like rite d, but doing it faster makes it even worse, not better.)

That's probably enough. I'll probably get used to it, I don't really want to, but I do want to continue to go.

And that's that. I swear I'm not miserable all the time, just some times.